What is Fire in the Belly? Do we all have it? Are we born with it? How do we make it greater? And why is it some people succeed; and some people don’t? These are the some of the questions we seek to answer in this podcast. It is a great privilege to hear from some truly amazing people who are extremely successful in their lives whether it be money, business, achievements or overcoming adversity. Our guests talk about how they have overcome, excelled, thrived and shown utter determination to fulfil their potential and become the mightiest person they can be. The personal journeys, insights and lessons that our guests share on this intimate podcast makes for remarkable listening. We all have phenomenal potential, but not everyone is living their best and mightiest lives. For many ‘Fire In the Belly’ is the invisible drive and knowing feeling that comes from deep inside. There is no right and no wrong as its personal. Do you know, and live with ‘Fire in The Belly’?
Mighty Pete Lonton from the ‘Mighty 247’ company, is an Mentor, Entrepreneur, Podcaster Coach, Property Investor, husband and father of 3 beautiful girls. Pete’s background is in Project Management and Property, but his true passion is the ‘Fire In The Belly show and’ project. His mission is to help others find their potential and become the mightiest version of themselves. Pete openly talks about losing both of his parents, suffering periods of depression, business downturn and burn-out, and ultimately his years spent not stoking ‘Fire In the Belly’. In 2017, at 37.5 years of age that changed, and he is now on a journey of learning, growing, accepting and inspiring others. Pete has the ability to connect with people and intuitively asks questions to reveal a person’s passion and discover how to live their mightiest life. The true power of ‘Fire In the Belly’ is the Q&As – Questions and Actions! Drop In & discover how to deal with challenges we face & maximize the possibilities!
Leave a comment for radio show guestsHave you ever stopped to think about yourself and your story? If someone were to write your memoir what would it say? We all seek some level of authenticity but have trouble removing the labels and finding our whole story. Welcome to Dropping In with Diane Dewey. In this program we’ll explore diverse stories on identity to help determine what is truly yours. Now here is your host Diane Dewey.
Diane: Welcome to Dropping In everyone. It’s month seven of COVID-19. So much is out of our hands, so we thought we’d bring in a guest, Mighty Pete Lonton of Fire in the Belly, to help us to keep motivated and stay focused on what we love and to influence what we can. Good morning, welcome Pete.
Pete: Thank you for having me on. That’s a great introduction, so thank you.
Diane: Yeah, well it’s great to have you on. I know that you mostly interview others so now the tables are turned and we’re just so delighted to be able to talk to you this morning. For those of us that don’t know, I have met Pete before online, it was a true pleasure, but Pete Lonton from England, from the UK is an entrepreneur, mentor, coach, property investor and father of three beautiful girls. Pete’s background is in project managing and property, but his true passion is the Fire in the Belly project itself.
His mission is to help others find their potential and become the mightiest version of themselves. Pete openly talks about losing both of his parents, suffering periods of depression, business downturn and burnout and ultimately his years spent not stoking the Fire in the Belly. In 2017, at 37 years of age, that changed, and he is now on a journey of learning, growing, accepting and inspiring others.
Pete can connect with people and into a totally ask questions to be real reveal a person’s passion and discover how to live their mightiest life the true power of fire in the belly is the Q and A’s questions and actions. So Pete, my first question to you is, questions and actions, that’s different than questions and answers. How so?
Pete: Thank you for the introduction, the questions are something you know the old knowledge. I think we all have two years of medicines. I think we need to listen more. So, question of what’s going on around and some that we can make an informed decision but an answer is not enough to take action in this world well. Otherwise, at the end of just, we’re not actually moving forward. So, being able to create what’s going on and interpret that and certainly bring that into our lives and moving forward, it’s quite key so, and it’s another bit of play on words but we can all read the books we can all talk about it. But, I’m actually doing living in today, that’s the key that’s the personally make all the difference.
Diane: So it’s really integrating the answer it’s not just a hypothetical it’s something that we actually do and act upon. That makes perfect sense to me. You mentioned the word books, that kind of rang a bell for me. I wondered, did you ever think about taking your accumulated knowledge and experience, and then these incredible interviews that you do with the most interesting people. Have you ever thought of compiling them into some kind of audio book or a book format or is this going to be a feature film or, does Fire in the Belly remain a podcast? How do you see it?
Pete: It’s very interesting you say that because this whole project started out a potentially a book and during that process into a number of interesting events. I discovered that I was properly diagnosed with dyslexia and ADHD.
Diane: Okay.
Pete: So at that point, I got actually got myself a book coach because I haven’t intention of writing a book about Fire in the Belly but a very quickly realized that I needed the input from other people to be able to talk about why what’s different for other people. Discovering when I had ADHD and dyslexia and distraction mentally the coaches and them to do that for me So I knew problems talking. I do probably about being questions but actually getting that on the paper is something that’s going to be made challenging.
So, that’s almost where in a nutshell, where the whole podcast came about because I enjoyed the fact of having a real sort of quality conversation with somebody and not just a short conversation but actually sitting down and giving someone the opportunity to talk about their life story journey in a little longer, but that’s a form that’s coming with no judgment, no expectations. Also not disrupting them so if they compare their story without having to converse with someone else, it is television and their language they do it.
But I was a result and there’s so much information there that actually, we wanted to be able to, not to just pick out on the cutting and floor, we wanted to be able to use that in the podcast was a perfect vehicles a lot. Take the summary about and then we can, yes the intention is to compile that into a book and get it transcribed which we’ve already started and take everyone’s passions and burning desires and putting it through, what helped me to unlock my journey and we put it together and hopefully without it, so it’s definitely been.
Diane: Well, I think the word unlock is a great one to use because Pete’s podcast, Fire in the Belly. These are conversations you might have with a friend across other sofa with your feet up, and nowhere to go nowhere to be. They take between what two and three hours, the unabridged version. And it’s really like having a conversation with a friend that you are such a patient listener. And as you say, listening is a lost art. I wonder, if that you think that that’s because we think we have the answers?
Pete: It’s a mixture of things and you’re absolutely right, listening is key and fortunately well, it’s a bit more competitive file to create environment one quite often the notice boys win. So, there’s not many people can listen and wait for the answer, the two busy comparing it to their own lives, or they see how it could be, they have done better or something different so for nothing that I judgement is there, it’s something I think it’s quite key that a lot of people.
And it’s sadly, it’s something they don’t always get, we don’t get a chance to sit there and I’m dead, and I would say in a positive way because if it’s not framed correctly, people can see an opportunity just to have a dream about something because that’s not constructive or positive. So I think if there can be frame correctly. And I think if we give people the opportunity to talk about it’s maybe quite obvious and we’ve never had this opportunity to do. But we are also, it’s happening to the subconscious mind, because the conscious mind can’t speak for that long time. It can’t be a pretty medicated conversation.
So when we get to that conversation what happens is you would start to be see the signs in the language that people can’t hide, you know, I have to do something. That’s almost the first action where somebody loves to do something, that’s something much is their values and along with it. So straight away they told me what they look halfway is they over easier to share. It can be big voice, tone, and language they’re using the animation and the energy behind it, not just what’s going on learning more and more.
Diane: I love that there’s the luxury of time, it’s something we don’t have even under the current circumstances where we feel pressed. I think that I’m glad to hear that the podcast will remain intact and that maybe yes circling back and taking the essences out for a book that’s also attractive but I think the main thing is, Pete when you’re interviewing I’ve listened to a number of your podcasts. It’s kind of a less is more approach where you ask kind of minimal questions, again, as you say, without judgment, without expectation that comes across, and the person’s able to ramble on which is, or get to a point where they’re not in their pre rehearsed answer.
So, you kind of scraped down through several layers there. And I wondered, is there a certain approach that you’re using a theoretical approach that the unconscious, which is more limbic you know not, it’s more feeling. It’s more of an energy level, you know, and do you think that by and large, people are a bit lonely I mean, even before the pandemic, just a bit lonely and not often given the opportunity to speak at large, to speak at length?
Pete: Unfortunately, I think that is the case we don’t always have the opportunity to sit down and not bashing. I don’t know whether it’s a lost art or one it’s just human nature. Just life has gotten so bigger and maybe the expression I really like called, you wanted to date not white. You know it’s not necessarily about having 5,000 contacts on Facebook, but if you had a close and deep relationship with five people. Because that is actually more meaningful potentially. So, like a good book if you can get something that you’re into, it doesn’t need to be ages, it can be half that size or even last something deeper meaning for me.
It’s these book out there that people read their entire lifetimes, we just read over and over again and pick all the layers. And I do think of it as a nation of people, we have so many layers and I enjoy the language and NLP side of it. Where I can ask somebody what their interpretation of a great day is and simply it may be eating an ice cream, somebody else it might be on their yachts, somebody else it might be the expensive home of their kids. If you don’t actually take time to ask the question and what that means for them, the unintentionally median healthy is not balance onto that then any Indian beliefs is to me, that they’re lifetimes of experience, is what our parents did that our schools and what are you educated, the way we were taught of using life education experiences.
Diane: Yes.
Pete: So we can talk about today without unless you ask the person, what tell me, what you see, what do you mean by that not until next question. So, I think, anyway, I’m doing saying, “Well, what’s your interpretation of this?” And then we can actually say, if I understood you correctly, then this is the action of this is what we could do because that will mean something to you.
Diane: Right.
Pete: That’s my view on it.
Diane: It leads from what’s resonant, so go deep not wide I really appreciate that. Pete, we’re gonna take a short break here. We’re going to come back and talk about the different elements and how you weigh them in education, background, and what they all mean when we come back. We’ll be with Pete Lonton of Fire in the Belly and how do we keep that fire going? Don’t go away, we’ll be right back on Dropping In.
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Diane: Welcome back everyone. We’re here with mighty Pete Lonton of Fire in the Belly, one of the best name podcasts and actually one of the most interesting podcasts around. It’s an opportunity for people to speak at length, and in depth, and about what their passions are what stirs them, and how to prolong that with Pete’s help. So Mighty Pete, this is to me a very inspirational title right there. How did you come up with it, this idea of being mighty?
Pete: When we look at ourselves and we project ourselves as we’re setting goals, right there. It’s very important that we set a clear vision for ourselves in the future. It’s a thing that’s been happening my entire life, and eventually like anything if you want to become something well you should start to actually become part of it and ultimately, you know it’s a little bit tongue in cheek but at the same time. That reminded me every day that I want to be the mighty stars to me. I’m not saying and necessarily, I don’t like this person but it’s a reminder, like a sticky note that sits on my branding every day that reminds me to try harder and push further every day. It’s a useful molecular product that way.
Diane: I like it a lot. It suggests, you know, taking a deep breath and just kind of putting your best foot forward. I think that your mission of creating the mightiest life for people that, that sounds like it just you know draws on people’s strengths, and you know you’ve had a series of setbacks, you’re quite candid about it in your biography. And I wondered if you could speak to that a bit about resilience and coming back. You’ve done it yourself. How does that work for you?
Pete: Sure, it’s I said, if you know there’s a sort of the start. I have 37 and a half years of being what I would call “average.” I’m not, you know, my average is, I’ve done well for myself and I’ve worked extremely hard, but I didn’t necessarily know who I was because as humans and as people were always taking on by the people around us and their values and beliefs. So I got to 37 and a half years and through mixture of losing a business and losing a parent, and I’ve got eventually, got to what you’d say is the lowest point of my life.
But it was the lowest, that was the hardest time in my life. But what quite almost refreshing or groundbreaking at that time, is the delays you, it strips back all the noise and layers. What I found and needs from speaking to other people is about the lowest point, actually the seed is so what becomes what values are your true meanings and one expression so it can be your lowest point, can actually trigger your highest point which I found quite interesting and that’s similar to what happened to me, the 37 and a half.
I simply make it almost 0.8 the trajectory in my life and said, theoretically on average. I’ve gone to nearly the midpoint of my life. If I continue to where I was, I knew roughly where I was going to end up. So, by saying right well I know what my features are. So, how about saying yes to everything or trying new things or moving, and living the mighty version and keep going, you know, curiosities that me was work and I end up. I’m not really the principal. I like technology since then so, it’s been a bit of a journey and I’m just been great fun, really stretching yourself.
Diane: I like the idea of following your curiosity and also the idea of pushing yourself, because there is a predictable trajectory and right now we’re also experiencing, maybe it’s a low grade kind of depression, a place where people are, again, stripped away of many of the things they need and want, we’ve limited contact with one another. And is it a time when people can try to carve out a vision of themselves that maybe we do take more risks, maybe we do take a step forward that we wouldn’t have ordinarily. Do you see that kind of moment that we’re in in time?
Pete: Absolutely, and it’s hard to say it out loud and without potentially being taken wrong but, you know, borrow the people who are suffering directly at the hunger COVID. COVID, I believe is actually the biggest opportunity in Bible seeing and all our lifetimes. You know, it’s been an opportunity for the whole world to more as stop, for people to realize what is essential? What is noise? What do they really need? Do they really love their job? What they’re doing, their life, their partners? Do they feel good? You know what is the fears of commandment, once we all happen and what was really elevate, so it’s been an opportunity to massively. And for those that choose and choose how to look at COVID. You can look at it as a pandemic and the biggest disaster of the century or multiple centuries, or you can say, Well, gosh, isn’t it great that I had a chance to sit back and just take breath for a second and reevaluate my life. I personally see a lot of them.
Diane: Yes, and reevaluate and maybe value your life, you know I love this question of, “Do I love my life?” It goes along with, do I love who I am being. And you know we can reset. Now, I know that when we spoke in my interview. We’re talking with Pete Lonton who has a podcast called Fire in the Belly, you’re a property investor and property manager who’s taken a kind of a wide detour, but not really because it’s about, as you say values sometimes values to stick to us because that we asked most of them from others, unintentionally, but to live intentionally is to choose and select those values, to me, I remember you said very directly, that at a certain point I was describing a chapter of my life before I knew a lot about my biological family.
And you said your voids were your values. I thought that was so profound and interesting. In other words, it’s almost like what Yong says, “What you don’t hold up to your consciousness and examine is gonna run you, it’s gonna run your life.” So you have to take dark and say wait a minute, is this or is this not my value and you know if you’re running constantly if you’re running from fear of failure, fear of abandonment, any of the list that we’ve got going. It is a great time to take stock, draw breath and say, “Is that a valid reason any longer for me to run the way I did?”
You’ve lost your parents quite young, Pete, this sounds. I mean you’re only, you know you’re young now. And when you talk about your business downturn and burnout. It sounds as though these did go kind of hand in hand. Yet burnout is a very little understood thing, I think here especially in the states where we’re go go go getters. And I find in Europe there’s often people in conversation will say well I’ve just had a burnout. I’ve gone to a clinic I’ve been, I’ve been away for three weeks and I wonder if you thought that there was cultural differences and accepting the idea that sometimes we’re not in top form?
Pete: Absolutely. I think for me, any time when you speak to someone. My favorite question that I like to ask people’s is that you know, “Do you like yourself, do you love yourself?” And once that contains like a little bit of valetic, it’s very telling us to where they’re up in terms of their own acceptance, in terms of their own alignment. Do they feel that they are, why they’re supposed to be? Do they feel that because a lot of us are living the life that our parents expect or could be something that we’re good at naturally?
Just because you’re good at something doesn’t mean that’s your passion. And that can be quite confusing, I am good at property, I’m good at investing. Is it my passion? Well actually no, it’s not. It’s a vehicle for me it’s a pension, it’s an investment fund and that side. Do I want to be doing it all the time and this is something I will spend my entire lifetime doing? Well, not offensively. You know I get much more joy out of speaking to people with understanding a different, your voice being your values, but also making sure that the foundation you build your life upon that it is a solid foundation, quite often we have brought through values from our childhood, may be that something happened or, we’re trying to please our parents, or we’re afraid of something happening.
This also the trauma, so we automatically build in a self-defense mechanism or we decide that I never want that to happen again. So all our beliefs are both upon us. So, it’s very common I think many people have a lack of something or fear of something of a time when they get older they almost constantly overcompensate. Be able to have death and never have that again in adult life. But the question based on what they really want, or are they just trying to make sure that event that happened before but self-defense mechanism can never happen again.
Diane: So, right protection and then obviously not taking risks, not stepping outside of the line. And I actually love the real estate metaphor you talk about foundational. You know what we’re standing on, and there again value, it’s I think there’s some sort of tangential relationship, the value of something, and understanding, these you can dissect and break down what you’re choosing to do, and apply almost real estate terms to it.
Does it have more resale value than it does, to keep it and invest in it long term or it’s interesting it’s just, I just think it’s a funny kind of aside. But you touched on perhaps the most important message, which is, “Do you love yourself?” Okay, that’s a hard one. Sometimes it’s, you know, do I respect myself? Do I believe I’m operating the best I can, at a given time? Do I say, I’m at my maximum current potential? How do you define it, when you ask someone, do you love yourself?
Pete: I like to keep the question open on purpose, because people will answer it the way they are in their own minds. I tend to find people who have gone through, all the highs and lows in their life and they’re actually in a place where they want to be typically find they’re the people who have accepted themselves for their strengths but their weaknesses and what they’ve appreciated, they are who they are, they can’t be everything.
And that’s okay. I tend to them find that people who are more critical of themselves and they have that and then a voice and that’s right really can struggle with that question so for some people that can be very emotional when they actually try and answer the question. And it’s very much seems to be a common thread but those can also clearly and definitely are how’s taking much more time to find themselves in a much more clear in their values, their beliefs that what their needs, their expectations. So that’s been a common sense. It’s interesting. There is no clear outside of thinking. The question is, what will define who you are and what you are?
Diane: Well, I like that you pointed out about alignment because there is a deep satisfaction in knowing that you’re actually doing what you love, that everything that you’re doing in touch matters to you, and matters in a deep, you know way and as you say, yes, you can have a hierarchy, what you do day to day sustains what you’re doing as a passion. But I am assuming that you’re then also helping people identify their passions is, is that’s also what comes out in your conversations? Right?
Pete: Absolutely. Ultimately, I think especially if there’s a very strong reason for having such almost a long podcast and a long interview that the first that being the conscious discussion the second that the more you’re almost transferring and there after a while of any conversation, and it can be induced by alcohol or could be going through. But actually, we get to the stage where the conscious mind can’t answer the discussion enough that I could actually asked her why the subconscious mind starts to actually get a voice.
But don’t typically tend to happen because of social media, or people being feared, being judged. But when you let people actually speak and they get that all out or suddenly, they start to use the language. This start to find out what they really want to do. It’s amazing the energy level they will attach to it. I mean, the best way I’ve ever found to describe it, it’s a bit like buying a new car, a new Tesla or whatever it is. We think of ourselves as an amazing human being with potential. However, if we leave the handbrake on, or we drive around with flat tires, the car, the potential is there.
However, all the external influences are preventing us from being what we want to be. So if we can find out what is holding us back. If we can find out and be doing exactly what we love to do. Then, we will. It doesn’t matter that money or energy or anything else. If you’re a passionate you will move heaven, earth, to make something happen. You’ll try harder, you work more, you’ll speak to all the extra people, you’ll make the extra effort. And suddenly becomes effortless because in alignment with what you really want to do.
Diane: You’re in a flow, right? You’re in, you’ve found your voice and your beyond presentation as you mentioned, social media is nothing but presentation, right? It’s what we consciously put out there so it’s kind of the opposite of where you’re going, which is to unspool from the unconscious, and tap into that so, so maybe a person who comes out of your interview which I found to be the case for myself, can drop into that point where they started to speak, where we started to speak, unconsciously kind of just riffing on what it is that really means something to us, and just tap back into that. I mean obviously we can’t be in that gear all the time but you’ve afforded the opportunity for that, and that’s the wonderful thing. I just commend you for it. I think the Fire in the Belly, I wonder how you tripped over it in the first instance you were speaking with someone and you had a great spark and then you suddenly said wait a minute, this is it, or how did it happen?
Pete: Well it’s interesting, like I had reached that point of 37 and a half years in my life. And like I say, we had just closed a business. You know I’ve laid off a number of staff. I had a young child at the time, actually young children. I was looking at some of the mentors and people that I respected around me and the well-known characters are scratching my head saying, “How is it that we all have 24 hours a day?” I literally the stress was through the roof at that time, you know like, the back end of depression just lost the business.
You know I was tired. Really tired. And yet some people here have done exceptionally well. Have time, in particular, you’re spending part of his day, kite surfing around his Island, hundreds of companies, you take any number of very influential people. And you start saying there’s something wrong with my formula that I can’t work anymore in one day, and you’re not experiencing the same thing that they are.
So that point I started to question them or what, what makes one person stand up and want to take life in the run to go crazy. And that you have somebody else doesn’t want to, they just want to sit down and take it easy and say well what what’s the difference and you know it got to feel, you know, is it when someone knows what they want to do. They’re passionate because the old thing of if you do what you love, you never work a day in your life. And that’s a really interesting expression of itself.
The top point I’ve seen in gut feeling and emotional intelligence and how I can work hard or not, work smarter not harder and, and all these things, and it just find that I kept coming back and I just thought it was a great job of saying it’s quite common. And even when you meet somebody in your life could be heavily set with depression or they’ve had a really hard times, I believe, from the moment we’re born. You know we have a fire in our belly.
That could be a very, very small little flame or you meet somebody else who is, they love what they do, they’re passionate. Their energy is just it flows off of it around them. But yet, we all have that flame, so it’s interesting to see why do some people really cherish life, and I want to live every day to the fullest and other people just don’t. And I was curious to know what the evidence was buying the value to the brought about for me from a low point in my life, and you might call it a midlife crisis. You know, for me it was like a midlife opportunity to cover the chains and that’s where it all came about so it was a low point in my life. It’s what I now believe is what I’m supposed to be doing, this is the truly.
Diane: Well, it’s certainly seems that way Pete, because it flows off you quite naturally and I think your communication skills and being able to elicit from people. That’s a gift, it’s partly because you are a deep listener, it’s partly because you give people time and space. And these are qualities that we’re in shortage of these days. We have a couple of minutes left. I love also the idea of turning off the inner critic, turning off that voice that says, oh no that’s not good.
You know that’s not going to work if you’re just playing and you’re really enjoying, that’s not work. That’s not life work. Truth of the matter is, maybe it does feel like play, maybe it feels more like play than it does, like work. And I also wondered, you know, because I remember you asking me and I hear it in your interviews. You ask people, what was the significance of your education? How did you do at education? And I wondered with the minute that we have remaining. Can you weigh in as an entrepreneur, is education a thing that we should be thinking about as unless you do well at it you’re not going to do well at life? Is that the message that we should really be absorbing?
Pete: It may be a bit controversial, but I actually don’t think education means anything, I think it’s a skill or a method to take on, and the ability to learn a new trade. When you find out something that you’re passionate about, I think you will learn faster, quicker, more than you would ever do in your entire life. But it has to be that you’re doing what you love to do when you find that, it’s easy, that’s the essence.
Diane: Okay. Well, you heard it here. I mean it’s an endorsement, it’s a kind of granting permission for people to really follow themselves, follow that what intuitively connects them. And maybe it’s not the structure of education, maybe it’s not what society says, you know, you’ve just pointed out a great entrepreneur and Sir Richard Branson you yourself are a successful entrepreneur again. And I really think that we’re going to look forward to when we come back from the break here for more from you about what it takes and what you think are the important ingredients in keeping the Fire in the Belly. We’re here with Pete Lawnton, don’t go away. We’ll be back on Dropping In.
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Diane: Welcome back everyone. We’re here with mighty Pete Lonton of the UK. He has a podcast called Fire in the Belly, it’s all about determining and ascertaining who you are. What makes you tick, and how to keep it a little alive. Thank you Pete, for before the break, allowing people to understand that maybe education isn’t everything. Maybe there are other forms of wisdom that we should be tending to. And I especially appreciated coming from your perspective as someone who learned when you set out to write a book that you actually suffered from dyslexia and ADHD.
This is a very common affliction, and I think people will take heart in the fact that you know here you are successful at what you do, you’re in property investing and management. How does a person with ADHD, start to form the idea of a podcast that’s open ended, non-judgmental and last between, say, two and three hours?
Pete: It’s a very good question, then I amazing challenge is to try and understand where person is coming from. So again, we’ll paint the picture in our head, or what’s going on and what’s happening. So, we need them to understand them to be able to put detail on that. And so the more you can understand that I’m stopping you are equals there to present our versions in our life, but if you can sit down long enough and understand what somebody is saying, well then suddenly you can take a bird’s eye view if you like you can take, like watching a film in the cinema, you get a slightly different viewpoint, and all the results, you can actually then start to connect the dots and what certain patterns people have gone through the lifetime expression of the icon see itself. And it’s surely somebody sitting in, you know, watching somebody else’s story’s, not really obvious. What’s going on with you. And because the person is living and breathing their own life every day, they haven’t really realized the pattern or what’s going on. So it’s really refreshing to be able to see that’s why I enjoyed listening.
Diane: That’s so great being able to point out the patterns because my next question is, you know, how well do we know ourselves? I really even when I went back and listened. For those of you who haven’t tuned in, Fire in the Belly is one of the most interesting podcasts around, people from all different careers, perspectives, venues, paths are weighing in and having a conversation with Mighty Pete, who’s really trying to sound of get at the core, and I know that even in my interview, I recalled saying something that I had thought of ahead of time, the pre-planned answer.
And so, this is the kiss of death, right Mighty Pete? I mean, you’ve got to get beyond what it is you think you’re trying to say. And you picked out the salient points, the points that made the pattern. One of the questions you ask people is, who are you at say 7, 22 and I mean, are those random numbers are these points in time that you felt were important in your own life or that you came to learn more important in your coaching education? What’s the source for that?
Pete: Yeah, well in the coaching in the MLP world, by the age of seven that’s essentially often seen as that’s the point where you almost are, you’ve grown up and I’m wearing things, you take everything as you know truth and what’s going on. But after that age, typically, then we start to add in different layers of beliefs and expectation, so seven is seen is almost all our role age, when we are just exactly who we are.
We’re not a makeup of anything else after that age, when we see what people are doing at that age is quite often a very good indication of what’s coming there after because after that we’re trying to please people, we’re trying to preserve our environment and grow around us.
Diane: So true.
Pete: Twenty years always hard years but then into our 20’s, when someone says, “Oh what do you want to do with your life?” We have made a decision in the questions, right because decision was it just what all our friends were doing and what we wanted to do. And then later on in life we tend to find that people have gotten to a stage where they don’t care what other people think about them. They realize that they can only satisfy themselves and they get to the point to saying, you know, call it a midlife crisis, call it an opportunity because so many successful people get to that 40 plus or 37 and a half plus age in their life and this is my life and it’s too valuable to wait. I really want to do what I want to do and I have enough so that’s when we make conscious decisions, though, there are different stages and I think we have to strip back the layers of other people’s expectations and wants to know what our natural vibration is, who we really are, and what we really want to do and not leave anyone else.
Diane: Our natural vibration. So if we took the bird’s eye view, Pete. When you were seven, so this is so exciting for me that I get to ask this question, I mean it’s such an honor to have you on the show but also to drop in with you about this. If we were to look at the seven-year-old Pete. What would we see?
Pete: Well, I think you would meet a very curious boy who was enjoyed looking at how things worked. I was really shy, but I also enjoy this time with myself, I really enjoyed seeing how things worked and what was going on. So, the free clear, and what I wanted. You know, I was very self-contained. So, here I was, which I don’t know if that’s the same as who I am now and some male hair that this is where I think a lot of people. We’ve actually given your inner voice a chance to really come out, and I know my inner voice.
You know the thing that was a child, it doesn’t shout it’s really quiet, and it doesn’t repeat itself. So if I’m making a noise when there’s too much going on, I don’t hear what I really think a lot of the time. I think I had the opportunity to listen more and do what I want to do. So, that’s the difference to me,but that was me exactly.
Diane: Well, it does sound like it’s replicating and just really the loveliest way because you’ve balanced, the need to tune out noise, and to focus in depth, I think, it sounds like the conversations you have on Fire in the Belly go deep rather than wide right. And to also try to figure out how things work that seems as though it could be a corollary maybe, I don’t know, to your real estate work and how markets work and what goes in and what comes out you know I mean there’s a way in which you do make an extension of yourself from that early childhood when you really didn’t give a hoot about you didn’t have the concept of what other people really expected of you because you’re lucky enough to not have any expectations placed on you then.
What a lovely time that is, I do think you also kind of allude to the idea that talking is a form of therapy, right? I mean people in order to speak, you have to put your ideas in some sort of linear fashion, right linear? You have to set words up into a sentence. For example, we’re all kind of suffering from apprehensions now and what’s the cure? What’s the sort of I mean what’s the role of communication in getting through, what we’re going through? How also do people the second part of the question, how do people reach you as a coach? And do you even talk to people from all around the world? Are you mostly based in the UK? Just give us a little snapshot of that and the role of communication and how far and wide, it goes?
Pete: I think communication is for me is everything, and are the complexity and ability of our brains, I mean it just on our mind and our souls and all the things that go on in our lives. I mean, to me it’s just astounding and communication is the way that we can actually almost make sense of it or we can try and help somebody else to understand what we’re seeing. And when you actually, sometimes it just takes that struggle, to be able to do that so if you can provide that environment and let people explain their view of the world or, you know what they really think or their values or expectations, we’re so keen on I think, we all need to have a chance to do that.
Sometimes it just you people say, I need to talk it out, or we enjoy expressing ourselves with friends because suddenly it’s giving us a chance to air those views and opinions, and hear them. So not only to thinking of our minds, they come out of our eyes, we can hear they’re on their own ears, we can judge somebody else walk and it’s just a, you know, with two. And it’s just too busy being in the social media and with everything else that’s going on around us that we actually not taking our own voice, which is being bombarded.
So communication is absolutely key and you haven’t always had a chance to do that. So it is you call a canister and call it communication call. I thought conversing with other people. But it doesn’t really matter, but it gives us a chance to view our own work but yes, I do I speak to people all around the world and any life. I’m looking to start a challenge in the same within two hours. I believe we can find anyone was true from that belly that was actually set them off on the path for the rest of their life.
And it’s what they truly want to do. And from that point on it, we’ll see them in a very short form of responsible for a lot of people setting up new businesses and all that and that’s always a byproduct of what I was trying to do, like this issue the part of that is amazing.
Diane: We become more than the sum of our parts, right in conversation and communication. It’s almost like an alchemy. And thank goodness for the technology that you are accessible. Pete Lonton is on Facebook at Mighty Pete Lonton, so it’s P-E-T-E L-O-N-T-O-N, Mighty Pete Lonton. And on Twitter too, Pete Lonton, Instagram Mighty Pete Lonton, and your website is fireinthebelly.net. I love the whole idea of tending to this fire within us, this flame that you actually maintain is something we’re born with.
I wondered if when you’re listening to your podcast, you take in the reflection of yourself as well because I tell you what I learned so much, hearing. It sounds kind of crazy or narcissistic, but I learned so much hearing myself, and where are the points are that I’m connecting where I’m disconnecting. What do you say to that? Do you Pete Lonton, also take your own advice in that and learn as you grow and grow from hearing yourself?
Pete: I do. I really enjoy because I think we all get inspiration and a chance to hear our own voice. When you hear in an interview and I’m certainly more of an in depth interview. That’s when you sort of, you almost don’t recognize your own voice because it is your loss. You know, for me, I always get my voice of guidance comes to me when I’m like for a walker in the shower it’s amazing. So when you hear yourself back, it’s suddenly it’s a reflection, it’s like going.
I recognize this story, but I haven’t read the words of attached to it and so it’s a little bit narcissistic problem. I think it’s familiar to this, for me, hearing on language is quite exciting when we’re talking and passionate but it’s great. I think that’s exactly what’s for people a chance to listen and to hear their own voice and we need to actually feel about something. Rather than, again, just trying to appeal to all people. So, again let’s make ourselves if I teach you.
Diane: I love it, it’s a mirror, I mean when you’re trying to learn how to do anything hit a golf ball and get to learn to ski, you look at yourself in a mirror, a coach will put the mirror up. And this is such a unique opportunity to use technology to hear ourselves. And as you say, discover what we’re actually thinking and feeling. What a great time that we’ve had together with you today. Mighty Pete Lonton and I wish that there was two more hours but actually there’s only one minute.
Is there anything you’d like to add that we haven’t said, and then we’ll just thank you so much for being here. Until next week, hope that our all our listening audience stays passionate and safe. Thanks to Matt Winer, and our engineer Robert Chileno, our producer at Voice America and thank you for listening. Pete, give us the words, keep the fire in the belly is that it?
Pete: We’ve all got the fire in a belly inside us, the ignition is already there, the choice is what we’re going to do about.
Diane: Thank you so much. We’ll take your words forward with us. Thanks, Pete Lonton for being with us. Bye for now and be well everyone.
Thank you so much for dropping in. Please join Diane Dewey again next Friday at 8am Pacific Time, and 11am Eastern Time on the Voice America Variety Channel. We’ll see you then.